I had never been so happy to feel ground beneath my feet as when we walked off that plane. Nathan had arranged for us to land on some strip, whose whereabouts I wasn't about to ask. It wasn't as if I would know where the bloody heck it was anyways. Now, if it were LA, or even New York, I might have stood a chance, maybe. Bloody, I liked that word. And, I think I'm going to use it every chance I get. Bloody...Bloody...Bloody. Good Slayer word, don't ya think?
Parker slid up next to me, and I knew I was in trouble. Her bright eyes glowed with an almost maniacal light, while her body hummed with suppressed hyperactivity. The questions came at me rapid-fire quick, and I had to fight not to check for holes.
"How'd you do that to Eliot? Wa-Bang!"
She mimicked the move perfectly, while her eyes were alight with joy. "Never thought I'd see anyone get the better of Eliot, certainly not that fast and with no bloodshed or gunfire."
She quickly glanced over her shoulder as if to ensure the team's Hitter hadn't suddenly appeared.
I sent the perky blonde what I hoped was a friendly smile. "Nothing special or anything, mostly just adrenaline and years of martial art training," I hurriedly explained. "Plus, I really had to pee."
I couldn't stop the grimace at the imagery those words brought to mind. Wow, and to think I scored so well on my SATs, go figure. Here's hoping she'd allow the subject to drop. She continued to bounce around me. I couldn't figure out if I was just that exciting or it was her normal behavior. Before she decided to adopt me, or I smacked her up side the head, Nate called us to attention.
"Okay, team, come along, I know that everyone's tired, but our transpo's waiting outside," he said over his shoulder as he continued toward large hanger doors opposite the plane. His elegant hands shoved them wide to reveal two gorgeous Bentleys.
Hardison and Parker released impressive whistles as they walked forward to take closer inspections. I watched an appreciative gleam enter Sophie's dark eyes. Eliot's closed off expression revealed more about him than I'm sure he wanted me to know.
It's funny how people think blank looks give nothing away, even when some reaction, any reaction was normal. Working hard against the norm quickly showed which people had undergone conditioning. The trick was to slide into the situation using parts of yourself without revealing the real you. It still amused me that after five years my friends continued to fall for 'cheerleader Buffy.'
True predators could blend in with their environment, while they waited to take the killing blow.
Eliot came as close to a predator as I had seen outside my world. It sure had my curiosity up about him. But, I found it oddly comforting to see cracks in the warrior's armor. There wasn't any doubt the battle hardened soldier lay just beneath a very nice surface. And, poking him would likely land you minus a finger. That included, if I planned to remain secret identity girl.
This 'normal' life wasn't as easy as I thought. Isn't it strange how once you get a chance at what you think you want it's not all that and a bag of chips. The truth about life, anybody's life be it mine as the Slayer or 'just' Anne or whoever. Everybody's problems felt world ending from their perspective. I had become intimate friends with the actual possibility of the end of the world on several occasions over the past few years. It had the largest teeth imaginable, and wouldn't blink even one of its thousand eyes as it swallowed you whole. Yet, fighting its physical form was far easier than the emotional overload, I felt since losing my family.
I scooted into the backseat of the Bentley, smiling up at Nate. The buttery leather practically reached out to hug me as I wiggled deeper into it. The Slayer had decided to hibernate for a while, that or the plane ride had permanently fried her psyche. I could only hope now that we were once again earthbound, she would play nice with the other boys and girls.
Nate went around climbing into the front seat, while Eliot slid behind the wheel. Sophie was already sitting in the back when I crawled inside and sent me that glorious smile of hers. It was contagious, and I couldn't stop myself from returning it. Those dark eyes were already gagging me in the enclosed space. Sophie reminded me of my mom, with the way that she took in everything around her, absorbing it, assessing it, and deciding whether it needed fixing.
I think Hardison and Parker simply chose to drive together or it came down to popular demand, not sure which. Eliot drove with the same precision, he did everything else. He never wasted the slightest breath or movement. I felt those cool eyes sweep over me each time he checked the rearview mirror. It wasn't by chance he had positioned the mirror to capture me within his line of sight. My eyes stayed glued to the passing view. He didn't need to know that with my enhanced peripheral vision, I was watching him too.
The more I learned about this strangely grouped team, I thanked fate for bringing me Father Michael. It's true I had raged against fate more often than I cared to say. On this one occasion, it had finally decided to play nice. Knowing what a bitch it was though, that normally meant it was about to bite me in the ass any minute.
Oh, well, I did have that nifty Slayer healing after all.
And, right on time my Slayer decided to wake up and sniff the tweed. Here it comes, wait for it. Yes, there it was, right on time. Tap. Tap. Tap. Taptaptaptaptap. Two heads twisted around to stare at me, while those piercing eyes bore into me from that stupid mirror.
Okay, come on Buffy think before these people drive you straight to the loony bin.
I quickly bent over at the waist to grab my calves. My nails sunk into the muscles as I tried to act as if I were massaging rather than distracting my freaked out Slayer with some pain therapy.
"Sorry, legs went to sleep. Hate the pins and needles, don't you?" I gasped out, continuing my torture and distract routine.
Sophie clucked over me, patting my back in soothing circles. Nate turned back, obviously happy to let the dark-haired beauty handle the situation. I had no doubt that Eliot kept the entire situation under surveillance.
I had no choice but to sit back in the seat. My hand slipped underneath my thigh, hopefully without Sophie noticing. Maybe if I closed my eyes and tried to meditate, I could soothe the savage Slayer, until we got to our destination.
It was worth a try.
I suddenly jerked awake when I felt the car stop. My hand lashed out to grab Sophie's arm as she reached out to shake me. Her eyes went incredibly wide. They went from me to her hand then back again. I immediately released her wrist, hoping I hadn't hurt her.
Shit, way to go with the acting at least semi-normal, Buffy.
"Uh, sorry about that, Sophie. I didn't hurt you did I? You startled me, and uh, in case, uh, you didn't notice, it's not a good idea, what with the training and everything that I've done, and I didn't hurt you did I because I wouldn't want to hurt anyone. All my friends know not to wake me, or startle, and well, I thought that I had told you that when I was telling you everything when I was talking to you before you know in the office, but I could have maybe forgotten, because you know I wasn't thinking about sleeping around any of you..."
Sophie placed her fingers over my still moving lips. I stopped talking, and heard twin sighs from Nate and Eliot. It took some work to keep me from narrowing my eyes at the sound.
"Its fine, Buffy. I'll warn the others to throw something next time or walk loudly, especially Parker, because well she's Parker," Sophie said as if that explained everything, and perhaps it did.
I liked the quirky blonde, but she put Willow on coffee to shame, and, that was saying a helluva lot! She cautiously removed her hand, and I had to swallow the laughter working its way up to my throat. Poor, Willow, I so owed her loads of hugs when I saw her again. An interesting thought danced through my head. I'd have to watch my little witch the next time she went into babble-mode. Perhaps, while I was fooling my friends with my dumb blonde routine, they were doing the same to me.
It's true at times, that it was better to run away to fight again another day. Without knowing where I was or even where I was going, I pulled the release and pushed to open the car door. Boy, did that give my Slayer one big happy. She was practically rolling on her back ready for a belly scratch. I stepped out to look around me, noticing that Parker and Hardison had done the same. They stood nearly chest to chest arguing animatedly. It was fun to watch Parker throw her arms around as she glared up at her much taller teammate. The hacker's head bobbled like one of those weird dolls people collected. I could have listened to their conversation, but it was more entertaining making up the words, as if I were watching Bollywood movies with the Scoobies.
You have no idea what I'm capable of, I can turn you into a toad by sending a burst through your cell phone. Oh yeah, well I can steal your fingers in the middle of the night, and you'll never even know they're gone until you wake up. I'll type with my teeth. Then, I'll steal them too.
Doors slammed behind me and shoes crunched on the gravel as the others joined me. It was the first time I bothered to take in where I was. Great situational awareness, huh? A good thing it was still daylight, and that I trusted the people I was with, well, for the most part.
I finally understood what gobsmacked meant. My neck tilted up and up and up; there was the real possibility that my head might hit my back before I saw the top of the 'house' in front of me. It was hard to imagine that we were staying here. I expected us to line up at the front door and someone to ask for tickets. To say that the house was huge was the ultimate in understatements. Prince Harry could use this place for a love nest.
It stood four stories high and took up the entire block. I had no idea what part of the city we were staying at in London. But, if this was where 'commoners' stayed, Buckingham Palace had to be the 'shit' and then some. I felt like Cinderella after Prince Charming came to bring her home to the palace.
Sophie came up beside me. She carefully placed her hand on my arm as she guided me toward the house. Her cultured voice tickled my ear as she started to explain the history of the house. I wondered if it came with its own ghost. I know she was trying to put me at ease, and I appreciated it. But, I didn't hear anything she said after Earl Whatsit owed her a favor, and blah, blah, blah.
I followed her through doors; we could have driven the Bentleys though with room to spare. Gobsmacked slid straight into brain fry. My fingers itched to check my chin for drool, though there weren't many chances since my head flew about like some hummingbird on acid. This was worse than Macy's After Christmas Sale, my senses were on overload. I wanted to look everywhere, split myself apart and absorb my surroundings.
Beauty surrounded me. Lush Isfahan Persian rugs worth a king's ransom decorated the black and white parquet entryway. I took everything I had not to knock Sophie sideways when she sauntered across it as if it came from Wal-Mart. That should have warned me of what to expect, but I was in Buffy denial-mode, as usual. My head was still spinning from the plane ride, and pulling up to Cinderella's castle. Sophie's voice buzzed in my head, which was starting to spin as I sidestepped around the rug. My mother would send me nightmares if I walked across the museum piece in my boots. I wasn't about to chance it, and bumped into a Chippendale Secretary desk in my efforts to evade the rug.
Wow, how graceful am I.
Sophie must have finally realized that she was talking to air, because she had turned around to stare at me. Her dark eyes were assessing me, and I had to say I'm not sure what she thought about Miss Spaz. I hurried to catch up, only to notice the lead crystal Baccarat chandelier hanging directly above her head. Okay, it was official. This was some weird episode of Punked. I whirled around only to see Luis XV chairs nestled beside the largest freaking fireplace I've ever seen. Placed above the mantle was no doubt Earl Whatsit's ancestor, and I had no desire to inspect the artist's signature. I don't think my heart could handle knowing.
Mom had enjoyed sharing her love of art with Dawnie and me. Although most people see me as the dumb blonde I play, her love of art, antiques and their history was something she passed down to her daughters. Simply standing here with all this within my grasp, and to ignore what it would have meant to her was too much for me.
Tears flooded my eyes as memories of my mother flowed forward. Her voice whispered of long ago strolls through museums. She talked, while I followed along watching her rather than the art she loved so much. Her soft hand in mine as she explained why she loved the little known masters more than the world-renowned, and then she would softly sigh, thinking I wasn't listening. She never knew I had memorized every word, every touch and gesture. I idolized her and only wanted to watch her - be her.
Sophie's must have realized that I was about to lose it. I felt rather than saw her rushing over to me. My memories still had me caught within their hold. It was too much, and I needed to escape, before I hurt someone. My Slayer was rising, and this time I wasn't sure I could stop her if she lashed out. I wasn't sure I wanted to. My pain needed a release, and the only one I knew anymore was through slaying. It was fight or flight. And, I chose flight. It wasn't brave, or smart, or any of a million other things. It just was what it was.
My feet were already moving, before I had actually decided. I guess there wasn't much of a decision. My Slayer knew Sophie was human, and no threat to me. She wouldn't cross that boundary, at least that's what I told myself.
Sophie yelled at me to stop, but it was more white noise added to everything else going on inside my head. My eyes darted from side to side, searching for an escape route. I needed to find somewhere to get my bearings again, so I could release my Slayer, and just catch my breath. It was too much. I wound my way deeper into the bowels of this monstrosity called a house. The kitchen finally came into view, or more like cafeteria preparation area. You could cook enough for an entire town in this place.
A door leading to the kitchen garden lay off to the right, and I headed straight for it. I don't even remember turning the knob as I burst through the door, and into the fresh, crisp air. My feet continued to move away from the house and onto the grounds. I'm not sure how I managed it, but I ended up smack in the middle of the carefully sculpted maze. I plopped down on the bench that was nearby, and tried to remember how to breathe around the ache in my chest. I'm sure I know how, it's just that my dopey brain won't tell my lungs that.
Whoosh, air came flooding in through my mouth, and I felt my lungs inflate the way they should. Check, breathing, breathing was of the good. Now, to get my head cleared and my Slayer under control - piece of cake.
Keep telling yourself that Buffy, crazy people never think they're crazy.
Let's try for something different this time, campers. I normally let my Slayer work out her aggressions, until she purred and played nice. I couldn't do that around the team and remain secret identity girl. The Council would never simply allow them to walk away from this if they knew everything about my world. I had crossed that line with Scoobies, and it had changed their lives forever, so didn't intend on doing that again. Not if I could help it.
So plan B: Meditate. Here goes nothing. I assumed the lotus position, and slowed my breathing to match my heart rate. The soft breeze blowing against my face was my focus point. Its touch drew me deeper into my meditation with each gentle caress. I cleared my mind the way Giles had taught me, much the way a painter prepared his canvas. With each breath I took, I released everything foremost in mind, until all that remained was my Slayer and me. We faced each other, mirror images, the same, yet opposite. My hazel eyes blazed brighter as they stared back at me filled with Slayer power.
I reached out to her, and she mimicked my actions. Our hands clasped, fingers entwined as our other hand automatically did the same to create a closed loop. I'm not sure what I expected to do here, or, even if I could reach her. Instinct guided our actions as our foreheads met above the circle of our arms. We gazed into each other eyes for endless moments, our breaths exchanged from inhale to exhale. I realized that I needed her as much as she needed me. She felt my pain and reacted in the only way she knew how. She fought against it.
The smile I felt tugging at my lips in that moment of clarity must have communicated to her. Her lips drew back in the most ferocious show of teeth, which I knew was her way of telling me she understood. Peace that I hadn't felt since becoming the Slayer flooded my body. She lifted her head from mine, released my hands and stepped back. I felt the loss of her touch, and it saddened me. Yet, I understood the gesture. She wanted me to choose.
I took a step toward her, and then suddenly she sniffed the air, and threw me behind her. We weren't alone.
I kept my eyes closed as my senses reawakened to the world around me. My Slayer rippled beneath my skin. She stretched her senses searching for danger, ready to attack as I fought for balance. She was there in the back of my mind, and I knew I could let her free from her cage with the least little provocation. The thought gave me the warmest feeling. In the past, I had always resented having her there, waiting to take over my body, and my life. Yet, something had changed here in this twisted cage of green. We had finally accepted each others place in our lives.
The soft steps behind me could only come from one person. A tangy scent drifted toward me confirming my conclusions. I didn't turn around, or even so, much as move a single muscle.
"Hello, Eliot," I said softly. My voice sounded odd to me. I wondered if it had anything to do with my emotional overload, or my new understanding with my Slayer.
He had stopped several feet away, and waited, for what I'm not sure, since he didn't try to get my attention. Sophie must have warned him about startling me. Perhaps, that was what he was waiting for, and dummy that I am for giving him exactly what he wanted.
Eliot walked around to stand in front of me. I opened my eyes to stare straight up into those bright blue eyes of his. The view was nice from where I was sitting. His expression gave nothing away, regarding what he was thinking. Eliot simply balanced on his heels as he continued to stare down at me. The aspect of the demon I once had in high school would come in handy right about now. Course, if I had kept it, I'd have gone bonkers, so moot meet point.
"You drew the short straw, huh?"
He flashed me a quick smile, displaying killer dimples. Damn, as if he didn't already have enough going for him with the good looks, long hair, and killer bod. Those responsible for handing out looks gave this man more than his fair share. Eliot was dangerous, and that didn't even take into account that he could beat the shit of you in several different languages. Totally not, fair.
"I volunteered. Sophie's worried about you. She said that you kinda freaked out when you saw the house."
He bent forward to kneel in front of me. His arm slowly reached out to take my hand in his. Eliot was careful not to make any sudden moves, as if he wanted to give me the opportunity to stop him. I had the feeling he had worked with skittish people before, if not, he certainly had good instincts.
I sent him a tentative smile. It was time to go back and face Sophie. If she didn't already think I was crazy, she would now. I held my hand out to Eliot. His dimples flashed at me as he stood back up, using those wonderfully muscled legs of his. He grasped my hand and pulled me to my feet. It was an interesting feat on my part, since I went from sitting cross-legged to standing in a single unfolding motion.
Eliot's eyebrow quirked, but otherwise he remained unphased. He had probably seen Parker do something similar, well close at least.
We walked in companionable silence back through the maze of twists and turns. I normally hated the quiet. It gave me too much time to think and remember. The thinking part wasn't so bad, and most people probably thought I didn't do enough of it. It was the remembering that seemed to come hand-in-hand with the thinking I could do without. If I remembered anymore today, I think my brains might ooze right out of my ears. The dumb blonde everyone assumed I was when they met me would become fact.
We were nearing the house when Eliot finally breached the silence. I knew it was too good to last. It was the story of my life.
"Are you okay to go back inside?" he asked, keeping his focus on the house.
I had no doubt that he was aware of my every move. He was simply giving me the impression I had some choice in the matter. This time if I ran, I knew the gorgeous Hitter would be hot on my trail. There were worse things that could happen to a girl.
"Sure, I think I've probably filled my freak out quota for the day," I quipped, sending him my best Buffy smile. Yeah, I still had it. "Guess you've probably figured out I'm not so good with the traveling." My hands went out to my side in a 'what can I say' gesture.
His chuckle was low and raspy, just like his voice. This man was trouble and he wasn't even trying.
"That's putting it mildly," he said with a hint of laughter still in his voice.
We had nearly reached the door. I stopped and he followed suit. We turned to stare at each other by some instinctual signal. Soldier to soldier, each knowing not to leave your back undefended.
"I mean them no harm."
He nodded his head, loosening that silky hair from behind his ear to fall free about his face. I don't know why I had the urge to reach out and slide it back into place. The last thing I needed in my life was to fall for some guy, who would walk away from me. There wasn't a chance in hell for anything to develop between us. Buffy and love were unmixey things. I had learned that the hard way, with more than one example for proof.
"Not really worried about it," he answered. "Besides, I won't let you."
His piercing blue eyes held mine for what felt like hours, before he turned and entered the palace we were calling home for the foreseeable future.
I could live with that. Off to face the inquisition, joy!
Eliot led the way back through the house. I tried to keep my eyes from noticing his cute butt, and the way his jeans hugged his strong thighs. The problem with not admiring the view in front of me left me with staring at the Earl's Masterpiece Theater home. Sometimes a girl just couldn't catch a break.
My Slayerness had peeked out while I played bouncy thought inside my head. It's hard to remember the human characteristics I no longer had, like soundlessly walking across marble floors without making any sound. People in Sunnydale never noticed, well anything. I knew the minute I ran into Eliot's back my already weird situation just went from bad to worse.
How do you explain to someone who doesn't trust you that you forgot to properly click your heels when you were walking? Or, better yet, pardon me: I forgot to include sound for you because normally I don't create any. It's just part of the Buffy package along with shiny hair, and an early expiration date. That would so go over well.
Wonder how fast Nathan would have the team back on the plane?
He surprised me by simply sweeping those blue eyes over me, and turning back around to continue walking. We didn't go much further before we stopped at another pair of huge doors. What was it with the doors in this place? Did I miss the day in history class when we studied the Giant Era? Was it right between the Renaissance and the Victorian? I remembered pictures of people with those big wigs on their heads. But, for doors this size, they would need to wear wigs over ten feet tall. Sheesh.
We walked through the doors, and I stopped dead in my tracks. I turned to Eliot, who flashed those damned dimples at me again. My fingers curled into fists. I knew it was me and that I should just, damn it, I don't know what I should do right now. I'm back to wanting to slay something, mostly I'm beyond exhausted. What I wouldn't give for a stake in my hand and a vampire nearby, or hell, I'd happily go find one.
Parker was hanging from the cathedral ceiling by some type of harness contraption. She had tied it around the beautiful hand carved columns and beams that graced the large ballroom. I watched her flip over and propelled her lithe body up and around the open area.
It was official. I had become my mother. Watching Parker perform her aerial ballet, my inner cheerleader wanted to join her, but the horrified sound of the mom voice in my head drowned her out. She was screaming at Parker to 'get down from there at once, young lady's do not play on the furniture', and she was scarring the, oh my gosh, hand-carved cherry wood.
Kill me now. Just pass me the stake, and I'll slay myself.
It's bad enough that I share my body with my Slayer. I'm coming to an understanding with that. Now, I had my Mom stuck in my head. What was next? Was I going to start channeling Xander, and tell stupid jokes? The next time I mimicked Willow's babble would I get stuck in it and not be able to stop!?! Somebody stop me already!
Nathan and Sophie had stopped their intensely intimate conversation to turn and stare at me. Hardison continued to type away on his laptop. He had data streaming across four large screens, reminiscent of the Leverage Inc. conference room. Eliot had started across the room to join him, when he turned back toward me. Parker was oblivious to the world around her, which from what I could tell was nothing out of the ordinary.
I wasn't sure who to look at or where to turn. Running wasn't an option, and questions were sure to come any moment. The only thought going through my mind was - HELP!
Nate and Sophie started walking in my direction. Their expression didn't bode well for me. They looked ready to send me to my room (channeling mom again here) or possibly kicking my ass back across the ocean for wasting their time.
My phone started to vibrate in my pocket, and I nearly joined Parker on the ceiling. Sophie let out a high-pitched 'Eek', and jumped behind Nathan. Eliot suddenly appeared beside him. And, I found myself with not one but two pairs of intense blue eyes staring at me.
I quickly retrieved my phone. The number flashing across it had me ready to do the Snoopy dance. Someone up there must have decided to give me break after all. Sending my audience a brief smile, I answered my phone.
Hey...glad to hear your voice too...no...long plane rides and Buffy so not of the good...some Earl of Whatsit...I do not massacre every name...Hold on, I'll ask.
Everyone listened to the one-sided conversation without remorse. No doubt trying to figure out who was on the other end of the line. Even Hardison had stopped typing to play this particular parlor game. I'm sure he's trying to hack my phone. Too bad for him that it's untraceable, just one of those perks when your best friend's a bad ass Wicca.
I looked straight at Nate. He was the leader after all, so the decision was up to him.
"This is a friend who has important information that can help us. He wants to know whether it's alright for him to come here, or if you'd rather we meet him somewhere else."
Nate's expression didn't change one iota. He should play professional poker. Those pale blue eyes of his stared at me, and stared and stared. I was about ready to ask Sophie to slap him on the back of the head for me. I mean I get it really I do, well I'm trying to anyway. I came to them asked them for their help, and insinuated myself into the way they go about doing things. They hadn't liked it, but they had grudgingly accepted it, accepted me on a somewhat conditional basis.
The flight here was rather bumpy, which had them doubting their decision. We arrive at Splendora's Castle, and I have the ultimate sensory overload and pull a Gingerbread Man. Now, I wanted to bring someone else into play that wasn't part of their game book. I'm sensing several flags on the play. My only hope was that I could have the chance for them to reconsider one when they rewind for the instant replay.
Sophie pushed Nate and Eliot apart enough to step between them. She glanced at me then back at Nate. Maybe they should have sent me to my room because if she does the staring thing too I'm totally going to lose it. I see her 'subtly' elbow Nate. Those intense eyes finally shifted from me to her. Sophie stared back at him, with this peaceful Madonna smile. She never said a word, simply smiled at him, as if she knew he would do the right thing. I almost felt sorry for Nate - almost.
He turned back to me. Some of the intensity had dulled, but I had no doubt it would flare to life with the least provocation.
"Tell him that we'll meet him tomorrow for late tea. We don't want anyone knowing you're here. We'll decide where to meet in the morning. You can call with the arrangements then."
Wow, he's good at this stuff. No wonder Father Michael recommended him. I nodded and went back to my phone conversation.
"We'll meet tomorrow for late tea...I'll call with the location...Yes, he is...Do you think so...Please be careful...I don't know...Are you sure...Me too...bye."
I closed the phone and slipped it back into my pocket. Time to face the firing squad. My eyes lifted to meet Nate's as I stiffened my spine to take whatever, he cared to say.
"Sophie told me about your reaction to the house. This is only an example of the worlds we'll be visiting and working with when we go to the Council Headquarters, and the private offices of Lord's of London" he said, extending his arms wide to encompass the house as a whole. "If you don't think you can handle this type environment then I'm not sure you'll be able to work with the team."
Parker chose that moment to drop from the ceiling. Her feet hit the polished wooden floor, creating a physical exclamation point to his words. She walked over to join the group, with those brown eyes inquisitive as they tried to absorb everything in a single sweep. Parker reminded me of Anya. She had no social graces, and simply saw things as they were. Perhaps, the world was wrong, we were wrong, in trying to change them, and should strive to be more like them.
"Why does Buffy not liking this house mean she can't work with us? I hate horses and still helped when we had to steal that horse."
I worked hard to keep from smiling, really I did. It was time for me to say something, so they won't think I'm Cookoo for Cocoa Puffs. Hey, let's try the truth.
"My mom loved art, antiques and their history. She used to take me to museums and explain to me how the craftsmen had used wooden pegs rather than nails. We'd stare at paintings to see if the artists had painted over an older canvas. Her stories brought each piece to life from Faberge eggs to hand carved ivory buttons. When Sophie brought me into the Earl's house, it was just too overwhelming. Memories came flooding back with a vengeance. I guess I just haven't dealt with my Mom's death, as well as I thought I had."
They were all just standing there staring at me. I felt like I had just ripped open my ribcage and shown them my barely beating heart. Damn it, I didn't want their pity, just their help.
Parker turned to the others with the most glorious smile. "See that is so such a great reason. It's way better than my horse story. Can we eat now, because I'm starved?"
Have I said lately that I loved Parker? She was so my favorite person at this moment. I would kiss her, except, she would probably think I actually wanted to jump her bones.
My head throbbed and I actually think my ears were ringing. Wait, no, shit! That's my backup alarm clock. Damn, damn, double damn!! I peeked over at the nightstand to see the shattered pieces of the clock splayed across it and the floor. Crapola! Great way to start the day, Buffy.
I jumped from the bed, grabbed some clothes and rushed into the bathroom. If I could just pull myself together and get downstairs, I glanced at my watch and grimaced. Ten minutes, I had ten minutes to get ready. Great googly moogly, nothing like creating a good impression, I glanced in the mirror and bit back the scream that tried to escape. A dead cat, there was a dead cat on my head. There was no other explanation for my hair. My hands immediately reached for my brush and with no little amount of Slayer strength went to work on the tangled mess. Advanced speed helped when applying makeup in a hurry, along with increased eyesight.
The relieved sigh that escaped my lips was well earned, when I entered the kitchen with barely thirty seconds to spare. Parker was filling glasses with juice, while Eliot cooked breakfast. My brow went up at the way he moved about the kitchen. Was there anything this man couldn't do?
Thankfully, Sophie entered in time to keep my thoughts from wondering any further. She greeted me with one of her smiles, and I couldn't help but return it in kind. Her arm slipped into mine with an ease of familiarity that I had learned was pure Sophie. She guided me further into the room, pushing me into a chair.
Parker brought me some juice and flashed me a smile. I had learned that she either talked your ear off or kept quiet because she was uncomfortable with small talk. That was okay with me, I'm not sure I was up to another round of Buffy introspection this morning.
I glanced around wondering where Nate and Hardison were at, and then checked my watch. Sophie must have seen me, because she sat down beside and took my hand in hers. I turned to face her unsure what she wanted to say.
"Buffy, I'm sorry that yesterday was so hard on you." She gently squeezed my hand. "What we do isn't for everyone, and we know that you want to be part of it."
I withdrew my hand from hers. If this was some easy let down, I so was not going for it. My Slayer had come fully awake, and I know she was peering back at Sophie. It was easy to see in the way that Sophie jerked back away from me.
"Stop," I whispered hoarsely. My voice came out in a strangled gasp. It was the same voice I recognized from my meditation when I was about to join with my Slayer. We were completely together on this decision, and we needed these people to understand that.
"I came to you for help, and I still want that help. I still need your help for this to succeed in the way I hope for it to. But, what you don't understand is that I plan to do this with or without your help. So, it's not whether I'm in or out, it's whether you are."
The expression on Sophie's face told me that I had shocked her. I'm guessing few people had done that. I stood up from the table, having lost all previous appetite and walked toward the side door. Turning back to face her, I sent her a tentative smile and said, "I'm going to step outside and run through my morning routine. Please, understand I've faced many hard decisions, since I was fifteen and came into my legacy. I know yesterday didn't show you my best qualities, but everyone has their moments. You can't tell me that any of you haven't had to deal with memories of the past creeping into the present. Mine just hit me rather hard yesterday." My eyes turned hard as my Slayer came through full force. "I can promise you this, when it comes down to it and you need me to be there for you, I will be. I always do what needs to be done. I always have. And, I always will."